Untitled

So lemme try this
out of the blue
im gonna come out with something

We grew up together
and till this day we are still growing up together
although distantly but
together
A family
We are
and I love all of you
more than anything
and I want all of you to know that
before anything else

I saw all of you crawling
walking, jumping, and now
Flying
Each and every one of you
High in the sky
All grown up
Old enough to know
what's going on

When there was only two of us
Seemed like long ago
almost like I had that in a different life
cause when the rest of you came
it was all grand
And I couldn't wait of what's to come

Held your hands in crowds
When I wasn't even old enough to hold my own
But I did it anyway
Because I felt so blessed
Stood by you
Pushed my shame away
Little hands, perfect
You were my world

Held up groceries
when you were inside mum's
Gave up my seat in a crowded bus
when Shane was inside of you
and when Timmy was so tiny
I was eleven

It all started long ago
We were together
The adults could never keep us apart
with whatever their predicaments were
It destroyed me when you went away
I saw my brother's eyes gloomed
when Timmy had to go away again on Sundays
I saw my sister's tantrums when Moon was dragged into the car
and right then my heart crushed
I was just a kid
But we were
Together

Now
Pains me to say
I live here
But I pretend like I don't
Moon looked at me like a stranger
There's barely words
No more together
and I blame the adults
and their selfish acts
But mostly I blame me
Because I should know what to do
I was there first
I saw things they haven't
But then and now
I am clueless as I ever was
and not to care
seems easier
and a painful irony emerges
because now tomorrow scares me

I will give everything
Tell me what to do
I will give
I will give
My love for you has no bounds.